these are my confessions

Owning up time. 

I stepped on that scale yesterday, and low and behold, the number blinking up at me wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be. I'm at 71.8 kgs., which is more than last week, but I'm still down from 72, so I can still hope to reach the sixties by the end of this month. Just maybe. 

And yesterday night I killed it at the gym, where I did half an hour of a paced walk at the treadmill and then 45 minutes of crazy-intense elliptical machine, and then my regular 100 ab crunches, so this week is off to a good start!!!

This is me at 71.8 kgs. That muffin top is one stubborn bastard, and refuses to quit. Although it seems like my thighs are beginning to give up: do they seem a tad smaller to you? Or is it just my hallucinations?

 Eck, I hate looking at myself in those pictures. Especially when my cheeks are so puffy, and it seems like I have a dimple on one side of my face. But it's not an actual dimple, it's just my cheek doing what it can with all the extra layers of fat.

It has been rather chilly these past few days, hence all the  layers of clothes.

And on the left you have today's work outfit. I don't like how this top looks with a sweater on (correction: I don't like how I look in this top when I put on a sweater too) but it's been raining nonstop since last week, and my office feels like the inside of a walk-in freezer. If you don't carry around a sweater, an extra coat and a scarf, you could end up with hypothermia. I am not even kidding. Oh and just ignore the hair, I'm having a bad hair day month, as a result of postponing a much needed haircut. 

My babies

I simply couldn't resist posting a picture of my babies. They are the newest addition to my wardrobe, and it was love at first sight. They hate feet and at the end I feel like I'm walking on glass, but it's worth it!!! Having these beauties on makes me feel like I'm walking the runway of a fashion show, and they make my legs look so much longer and thinner. Don't you just love heels? I know they are terrible for your spine and posture and end up messing your feet, but honestly, screw the side effects, we're all eventually going to suffer from something or the other. Let's take advantage of our young bodies while we still can. 

Anyone have a favorite pair of heels that makes them feel like royalty?

falling off the bandwagon

Shameful puppy eyes 

This past week, and especially during the weekend, I have to admit I fell off the bandwagon. Not only did I stray off the path in terms of what I ate, but I also skipped my workout twice, and I only made up for one of the two missed sessions. 

So SHAME on me.

I guess this has happened to a lot of people, and I'm definitely not going to give up just because I had a bad week, but geez I feel like such a failure. I've only been at this whole blogging experience for a week and a half, and I've already done exactly what I was preaching you should avoid. Darn it. 

While there is no excuse for eating like crap and skipping out on my workout, I must say most of the fatty foods I had over the weekend can be traced to my emotional state. I crashed for the very first time on Saturday morning, and it was awful. I've only been driving for a couple of months, and had been feeling like Superwoman for the most part. Then this bastard had to ram his car into mine in the most stupid way possible, and completely throw me off guard. Thankfuly, it wasn't anything too serious, and neither my spine nor my darling car suffered any damage, but the entire thing made me run late for an extremely important meeting. 

I was so angry and upset over the whole thing, I ended up bursting into tears back home, and my roommate took me to a late brunch to try and cheer me up. Instead of ordering the ham and spinach omelette I should have, I ended up having Eggs Benedict. The orchestra of flavors swirling in my mouth could not make up for the guilt I felt as they took the empty plate away, and I ended up feeling even worse. That night I practically finished a bowl of popcorn all by myself, and Sunday was chicken-wing and greasy blue-cheese dip day. 

SO, all that nasty eating topped with my lack of exercise scared the hell out of me and I skipped my weekly weigh-in. BAD CRISTINA! Yesterday I panicked and avoided the scale like the plague, but after visiting a couple of my inspirational blogs (particularly Mama Laughlin's) and reading my older posts, I've garnered enough strength to face reality, and I'm going to weight myself before lunch. There's no better way to deal with the consequences of a bad week than to know exactly where I stand. I've also rescheduled Friday's workout, so today I'll do both Friday and Monday's sessions. 

I'll post an update later today. Hopefully, the scale won't be too bad and I can get back on track quickly. Sorry if I let you guys down :(

inspirational friday

Jordin Sparks in 2009

Jordin Sparks today

 Friday at last folks! After such a crazy week I am SO looking forward to sleeping in and watching reruns in my pajamas. Today's inspiration to avoid binges is none other than the very talented Jordin Sparks. According to the Huffington Post, she lost 50 pounds (YIKES!) in about two years, and can now rock a tiny blue bikini on the cover of a health magazine. What better inspiration than that? She confessed that her trigger to changing her nasty habits was realizing she was always feeling sick and tired. That is SO relatable! I got to a point where I was falling asleep all the time and getting these nasty headaches every single day, and I'd be all cranky and annoying; it sucked. And to think that so often you don't associate all those symptoms with your lifestyle, you even start thinking its normal. 

BUT IT'S NOT.

Changing your diet and exercising is not just about fitting into a smaller pant size or being able to flaunt a bikini body, it's also about treating your body the right way to live a better life. Feeling exhausted can be directly related to how how much exercise you do, and the probability of you ending up with a serious disease can be greatly reduced by eating balanced meals. Committing yourself to exercise and a healthy diet will make you beautiful on the outside AND on the inside. 

So how about it girls? Hop on the healthy lifestyle boat and begin your journey to a sexier, healthier you. I hope you all have an amazing weekend, and remember to keep yourself constantly motivated! We'll meet again for Weight In Sunday, you should all keep your fingers crossed so that scale delivers good news, I'll need all the help I can get to bring that bastard down at least 1 kg...

...and breathe

JESUS, this has been one crazy week. Being the master procrastinator that I am, I ended up delivering all my paperwork for this contest I'm entering at the last minute yesterday, leaving me with no time to eat or exercise. I KNOW, I KNOW, I SUCK. Trust me, I've beaten myself up enough over it, but what's done is done. I finished the essay in record time and even had my grammar-nazi roommate review it before sending it on its happy way to win me a place at the 67° General Assembly of the United Nations in October. Yes, you read right! I want to be one of the two Youth Delegates that get to accompany the Mexican Mission to United Nations at the General Assembly for two whole weeks. Deadline was yesterday, and I basically spent the two and a half weeks before yesterday pondering over the list of reasons I didn't feel like writing anything, let alone a five page essay on poverty. 

So as usual, yesterday morning I panicked and realized I only had a couple of hours to write something somewhat decent and get all my paperwork in order. Damn. Thankfully, my boss is on vacation and things are slooow at the office, so I had enough time to brainstorm and write the thing in one day. And at exactly 11 pm I sent it through the Ministry of Foreign Affairs website. And so begins the three-week waiting period to find out if I made the cut. Y'all should keep your fingers crossed for me :)

That's me, Tuesday evening.

Anyhoo, let's move on the the more exciting news shall we? On Tuesday I had my very FIRST workout since I began this whole dieting/blogging experience. YAY. It was fun actually, and made me realize just how much I enjoy working out once I'm actually there. Sure, I wheezed and felt like I would die a slow, painful death, but after seeing 350 calories burned on the machine, I forgot all about the pain. I mean come on, 40 minutes of intense cardio and I've shed 350 calories?! WHAT SORCERY IS THIS!!! I'm regretting not having started sooner! 

Yesterday I had to skip the exercise so I could finish that damn essay, but today there's no excuse! I even downloaded the MiCoach app from Adidas to help me, and it is awesome. If you haven't tried it yet, you must go to their website and create an account, YOU MUST. Then you just download the app on your phone and it will guide you through your workouts, sexy trainer voice and all. After typing in your statistics, you can select a plan that works for you, beginning with the objective you have (lose weight, build muscle, etc.) and then moving on to the workout length you think can endure and how many times a week you plan to exercise. For example, I'm going to workout five days a week doing 40 minute cardio, and then three times a week I'll be working on some strength exercises to tone my muscles. That sounds like a lot of work, but once you get the hang of it, it's a breeze. And you can keep track of how many calories you've burned, how many workouts you've done, etc. Click here to go to the MiCoach homepage.

This is my miCoach home page

All the MiCoach workouts are based on different zones, and each zone has a certain pace or heartrate assigned to it. Blue is the lightest pace, and red is the most intense. The trainer's voice guides you through each transition, and the cool part is that you don't do the same thing everyday. In my case, I selected level 6 which means I believe I can resist a 40 minute workout, but I won't be doing 40 minutes every time. Some days I will do 25, others 35, others 46, and so on. That works amazingly for me, because I get bored easily. Also, you can choose which activity you want to do as cardio, the predetermined one is running but in my case, I prefer the elliptical machine. Once you're done, you can type in the statistcs of your workout (usually the machine will give them to you at the end) as far as calories, distance, heart rate, etc. 

So if you, like me, have run out of excuses to exercise, start today! I know just thinking about it makes you want to drop dead, but not only will it help you achieve your weight loss goals faster, it will help you feel better eventually. And seriously, who doesn't want to flaunt a fit booty? I can't wait to try on a two piece and  make all those mouths drop, to be honest. So let's get cracking people!!!

yes you can!

As I mentioned in an earlier post, I used to be a competitive swimmer, but once that was over I did so little exercise you could say I developed an allergy to it. Sure, I took some pilates classes during high school and I was a cheerleader for a while, but nothing really struck my fancy to keep at it, and so here I am, at twenty four, with the athletic condition of an eighty-year old woman. My complete and utter lack of physical condition never really bothered me until one day, about two years ago, when I was at the subway with my best friend. A little backstory on the guy: he's thinner than Nicole Ritchie at her worst, smokes about twenty-twenty four cigarettes a day and hasn't exercised a day in his life. Yes, you read correctly, EVER. 

So you can imagine my surprise when we decided to take the stairs instead of the escalator because it was crammed, and by the time we went up the three flights I was wheezing so hard I thought I had developed asthma. He, on the other hand, was breathing normally and was staring at me with a strange look on his face. How was it possible that a hardcore smoker that had never seen the inside of a gym in his life could do the three flights of stairs without so much as a deep breath at the end, but I was practically dying of a heart attack? That's when it really hit home, and I began to wonder my body was so out of shape the day a broken elevator forces me to take the stairs I'll collapse. 

I've been in and out of gyms, pilates and zumba classes and even do-it-at-home workout routines for a really long time, but after a while I find a perfect excuse to quit and never look back. Right now, that excuse is work. I am at the office from nine to seven, which means I get up at 7:30 am and arrive back home somewhere in between 7:30 and 8 pm. Anyone that wondered if I was doing some sort of exercise (my family mainly) would get a well-practiced response consisting of 'Oh no, I don't have time! Hell will freeze over before I get up earlier than 7:30 to exercise, and honestly when I get home at night all I want to do is eat some dinner and sleep. I just don't have the time nor the energy...bla bla bla.' 

When I started this blog, I made a commitment to not only change my diet, but my whole lifestyle (hence the name of the blog), but up until now I had limited myself to avoiding unhealthy foods and counting calories. Alas, the time has come ladies and gentlemen. I have finally made up my mind to workout EVERY DAY, and I'm starting today! What made me come to my senses, you may wonder. Well, to be honest, I realized that I waste at least an hour of my time, every single day, trying to find a parking space when I get home. I live across the street from a college campus, and school just started last week, so my street is always packed to the maximum with vehicles. Seriously, they even do two and even three rows frequently, and it doesn't change until around 9:30 or 10 pm, when all the students go home. My building doesn't have parking spaces, so every day I have to drive around the blocks around my building, desperately trying to find a parking space. So then it hit me: instead of wasting my time driving around, I could go to my aunt's house, workout there (she has a fully equipped gym in her attic) and then go back home to be greeted with lots of available parking spaces. 

HOW GENIUS AM I?!

No seriously, I'm surprised it took me this long to figure it out. So anyway my goal is to do some cardio and a few resisteace exercises for about an hour, an hour and a half, from Monday to Friday. Hopefully that will also speed up my weight loss, but I guess it won't be as instant as it is when you change your diet.

So wish me luck you guys, I'll post all about my first session later today or tomorrow morning. 

Let's put that elliptical machine to good use!

weight-in sunday

I know today is Monday, but I had the most hideous weekend and was unable to post until today, I'm so sorry!!! But I'll try to keep all my weight-in posts strictly Sundays, as planned. Anyhoo, on to the good news!!! I stepped on that scale yesterday not really expecting positive results, since last week I didn't strictly adhere to my diet plan. On Tuesday I dined out with my best friend and had a baguette (white bread!) with duck paté (fatty fat), and then on Wednesday I went to Starbucks and had an oats-and-honey muffin, which I thought would be alright, but turns out it had like 400+ calories!!! So yeah, not the best week diet-wise. 

So you can all imagine my surprise when I stepped on that scale and realized I had lost almost 1 kg! I went from 72.1 to 71.3, which is major for me. I am so close to reaching the 60's, I can practically feel it! To celebrate, I decided I would give two no-bake healthy cookies recipes a try. I am a cookie monster, so having to restrict myself in that area has always been a challenge, especially when my mother bakes the BEST chocolate chip cookies you will ever try. I had found these two no-bake cookie recipes on Pinterest a few weeks ago, and they looked rather yummy despite being flour and butter-less. 

I must warn you, they definitely do not look as tasty as the pictures on the original websites, but trust me, they turned out so darn good!!!

On the right- the frosty chocolate oatmeal cookie, on the left PB + chocolate chips cookie

The first recipe I tried can be found at the Oh She Glows blog (which has lots of awesome healthy recipes), and while mine didn't turn out nearly as pretty, they are just as tasty and perfect for a chocolate fix like she promises. I left out a couple of ingredients (like the chia seeds) and used semi-sweet Hershey's chocolate chips, but otherwise followed the recipe to a T.

Frosty No-Bake Chocolate Oatmeal Cookies 

(adjusted to what I used)

Ingredients:

1/2 cup rolled oats

1/4 cup non-dairy chocolate chips (I used semi-sweet)

1 large banana

1 tablespoon pure vanilla extract

1 tablespoon cocoa powder

Directions:

1. In a microwave safe bowl, melt the chocolate chips for about 60 seconds. WARNING: Be extra careful not to burn.

2. Stir the mixture until all the chips are melted, then mash up the banana and incorporate it into the chocolate.

3. Stir in the oats, the vanilla extract and the cocoa and mix well. 

4. Line a plate with parchment and drop around seven cookies onto it. Freeze for about one hour or until firm. 

Yields: seven small cookies at 80 calories each.

The second recipe I tried used a lot of the same ingredients, but added peanut butter. I got it from the Fitsugar website, and while I pressed mine into a cookie shape, while their pictures show more bite-sized pieces, everything else was unchanged. Oh, I also substituted the cup of sugar for Baking Splenda, to avoid all that sugar.

Healthy No-Bake Cookies

Ingredients:

1 banana, mashed

1 cup Splenda

1/4 cup cocoa powder

1/2 cup nonfat milk

1/4 cup peanut butter

pinch of salt

1 tablespoon pure vanilla extract

3 cups instant oats

Directions:

1. Place all ingredients minus the vanilla and oats in a medium saucepan and bring to a boil over medium heat, stirring often.

2. Let the mixture boil for one minute, remove from heat and let the mixture cool for one minute.

3. Add the vanilla and oats and stir well to combine.

4. Drop by teaspoonfuls onto waxed paper and cool to room temperature.

This recipe yields around 15 small cookies.

My mid-morning and mid-afternoon snacks for today!

The result was so yummy, I was forced to leave several cookies behind at my aunt's house -they all loved them! And now I have a yummy snack for the office today, one I won't feel so guilty about.

Next weekend I'm visiting my mother, so I'm thinking about making a new recipe. This time I'll have an oven and expert hands (aka my mum) around, so perhaps I'll give these babies a try. Don't they look incredibly amazing? My mouth is watering just from looking at them! I'll have to skip out on the powdered sugar of course, but I'm thinking Splenda will make them just as good.

inspirational friday

Robyn Lawley posing for UK lingerie brand Boux Avenue.

Weekends are probably the toughest when it comes to sticking to the diet, mostly because I live with two guys that couldn't gain a pound even if they tried and follow a very strict diet consisting of Nutella, white flour tortillas and fatty cheese. So my house is always filled with temptations that get harder to resist the more time I spend around them. My roommates think a nice Saturday lunch consists of ordering pizza and breadsticks, and often I find myself starving, without anything healthy in the fridge (I usually go to the supermarket Sunday evenings), and trying to resist the delicious scents coming from inside that greasy box. 

This is why I need extra motivation on Fridays, and the reason behind 'Inspirational Friday'. I will post pictures of women I admire in the hopes of garnering enough strength to make it through another weekend without stuffing my face full of chocolate chip cookies. Inaugurating this soon-to-become a la parisienne tradition is Robyn Lawley. Who better to kick off a weekend full of healthy food (and perhaps even excercise!?) than a full-figured, gorgeous model that has already graced the cover of VOGUE Italia and ELLE? 

According to Skinny Vs Curvy's website, this beautiful gal, age 23, is 1.83 meters tall and a size 12 (in Mexico that is equivalent to a size 34 according to Google) and her measurements are 91-81-106 (in cm). This translates into one drop-dead gorgeous woman with a full figure that obviously doesn't starve herself to fit someone else's conception of "pretty" but also stays fit and healthy. If you don't believe me, just look at that picture up there: her legs are toned but not stick-thin and her waist-to-hip ratio leaves enough room for sexy curves without the extra muffin top. 

In my fight with stereotypical beauty images, I've always thought that while beauty can come in all shapes and sizes, the number one thing to always keep in mind is health. You can be thinner than a breadstick or have more curves than an F1 track, and you can still be healthy. Not all catwalk models are anorexic, just like not all plus sized gals stuff their faces with crappy food. Most of the times genes determine your body shape, and it doesn't matter which one you got, you are still beautiful, but it is important to stay healthy. I was blessed with a super curvy body, so no matter how hard I try I will never be supermodel thin (I learned that the hard way many years ago). Yet that is no excuse to ingest carbs like a crazy person, because like Robyn Lawley up there I want to be curvy yet fit, so even though I cannot be described as super skinny, I do fit this other description: 'damn she's hot!'

Happy Friday everyone, and here's to a healthy weekend!

the eternal dilemma

Today's work outfit

I bought this dress like four weeks ago, mainly because it was love at first sight the moment I laid eyes on it. But then when I tried it on, I realized all my belly fat poked out and created this nasty bulge, not to mention I had to hold my breath and try to suck my stomach in as much as possible for it to zip up. 

Even so, I still bought it, mainly because of my wounded ego. How could it be that I was so fat I didn't fit into the 'L' size of one of my favorite stores anymore?  I told myself it would work as motivation to lose weight so I could fit in nicely eventually. 

Ever since that day, I've lost around 3-4 kgs, so the dress fits slightly better, but as you can see it is still rather tight around my hips, and the bulge in my stomach refuses to quit. That's why I usually wear it like so: 

This is one of my nasty habits related to my insecurities about my weight: I tend to use sweaters over anything that is slightly fitted. I also have a knack for buying oversized tops to hide my belly fat and 3/4 or long sleeves to hide my flabby arms (in case it were sleeveless, I use a sweater or a blazer over it and never take it off, not even if I'm melting). I never actually noticed this habit until I met my best friend, who began nagging me to stop wearing sweaters over things and to avoid oversized clothing like the plague. As a matter of fact, not only did that guy push me into bolder clothing (short dresses, fitted tops, or a.k.a. clothes I would have never even considered wearing, ever) he actually managed to make me a bit more comfortable in my own skin. 

So I'm still struggling with my self-image, but I've made some progress, TRUST ME. It would be awesome to look back at this post a year from now and be all like 'Damn, I'm so glad the sweater-wearing era is behind me!'. Or something like that.

the stats

Day One

Ok, so let's write down my basic info for measurement purposes in the future, shall we?

Weight: 72 kgs.

Pant Size: 11-13

72 kgs.

Target weight: 60 kgs (at least)

Pant size: 7

In order to achieve my goals, I downloaded the MyFitnessPal app, and this is what it says my calorie consumption should be in order to lose weight:

I began counting calories Monday, and so far I've only stepped outside the limit once. I thought this whole calorie-counting business would be a drag, but it is actually rather useful! I highly recommend you do it, if only at the beginning of your diet regime. It helps you learn what exactly you put in your mouth every day (trust me, it can be much more/less than you think) and pushes you to make healthy choices but with some room to indulge once in a while.

Now that the first step is taken, I need to figure out exactly where I am going to squeeze an intense excercise routine. I've been giving excuse after excuse, but honestly I just need to come to terms with the fact that none of them are valid, I'm just lazy. Scanning YouTube, I found many work-out videos in short sessions that could work to get me on track without killing me.

I'll keep you posted on how that turns out.

this is it.

This is me at my thinnest.

First entry, yay! I had the idea of creating a blog to keep some sort of track over my weight when the always useful Pinterest led me to Mama Laughlin's blog, and after skimming over a couple of her posts it hit me: what better way to keep constantly motivated than to keep a blog? But before going on, I guess I should fill you guys in a bit more about me. 

 My name's Cristina, I'm 24 and a soon-to-be college graduate. When I was a kid, my mother signed me up for swimming lessons that turned into competitive swimming at age five, and for the next eight or so years I had intense, daily training and was enrolled in constant swimming competitions. At first it was nice, because I had a ton of friends and nothing much to do with my afternoons (what kid does?) but as I got older, having to sacrifice most of my afternoons (and for a while there, part of my mornings as well) for swimming became annoying, and I ended up resenting my coach, the pool, my mother, and basically anything that had to do with swimming. When I hit 13, I finally called it quits, and dropped out. At this point you're probably wondering so what? Well, the thing is during all those years, I grew used to eating whatever I wanted. With all the energy you need to swim, all the fat and carbs and sugars I ingested were gone in a second, and the first few years of adolescence I had a rocking body. Once I quit though, all the excercise was taken away and I was left with constant hunger that led me to eat twice what the rest of the girls my age ate. 

 This was the beginning of a crazy rollercoaster that has been building up over the years and created my biggest insecurity: my weight. High school was probably the worst time, I gained so much weight that by the time senior year rolled by I was two pant sizes bigger than in junior high and when prom pictures popped up all over Facebook, I looked like a hippopotamus in a dress. Seriously. I managed to control my weight a bit more during my second and third year in college, and I actually lost so much weight I looked like a different person, all because of a very strict diet. But by the time December rolled by, the free pass I gave myself for the holidays turned into an entire year of indulging myself with whatever I pleased. I gained back all the weight and then some. 

 Currently, I've realized I need to go beyond the 'lose a couple of kgs' mindset and actually change my eating-related behavior entirely, for both health and aesthetic purposes. For once in my life, I want to know how it feels like to be considered skinny, and to try on whatever I please without wondering if it will fit. This blog will keep track of my progress (or lack of it), and hopefully it will provide the much needed motivation so I don't give up along the way. Easier said than done, right? Anyway, I'll post pictures as I go along, coupled with skinny recipes I try out, and maybe even an excercise regime (when I actually get myself to it). 

Wish me luck!